Eternal virgin and relentless simpleton Fadel here asks you to stop whipping the willy lest you go to hell. Can’t you just leave people alone?
And you wonder why there’s so much pent up aggression in this region…First they tell you not to have sex, ever. And now this. He might as well have taken the more direct route of politely asking you to just strap on that C4 and press the red button upon sighting a considerable crowd. Fadel, you dense fuck, go find yourself a chick, take her out to dinner, blow off some of that testosterone.
But before minimal memory retention kicks in, I implore you to consider the alternate scenario in which our tragic protagonist Fadel meets a girl and finds the grey matter to approach her. His behavior changes, so does his appearance, perhaps even his temporary thoughts. Sexual endeavors even become a tangible possibility. And thus the evolutionary chain reaction begins within him… Introversion, reflection, and a taste for the tender. Impressions will matter, ambition inevitable…job and donuts surely to follow.
There he was, a moment ago, thinking alphanumerically, here he is now, evolved, alive, and exonerated.
